I struggle...I struggle with feeling like I have to make my life "work"...like I have to be Supermom, Superwife, Super...everything...and I have to be honest, I am a walking failure.
Now before you think my self-esteem is set on low...I happen to like myself :) I'm a strong enough person to admit my weaknesses.....to admit them, embrace them, and try to be better the next go round'...
Laying in bed with my 2 year old son, trying to talk him into sleep...and listening to Cory Asbury's song "Mercy"...over and over and over....
"Cory Asbury - Mercy"
Your mercy, it covers your throne like a rainbow, like a rainbow
And here I find myself in the sweetest embrace
with a love that I could never earn
and it’s only in this place
that I am truly safe surrendered to beauty untold
Your mercy it covers me wherever I go
Your kindness it never ends, oh Lord
There’s nothing I could do to change your mind
about me, nothing I could do
Your mercy, it flows from your throne like a river, like a river
And here I find myself in this healing embrace
It’s a love like I have never known
and it’s only in this place
that I am truly safe surrendered to beauty untold
Your mercy it covers me wherever I go
Your kindness it never ends, oh Lord
There’s nothing I could do to change your mind
God, there’s nothing I could do to change your mind, about me
There’s nothing I could do, to keep you from loving me
to keep you from wanting me, Jesus
Your love, it never fails
Your love, it never fails
Your love, it never fails me
Jesus
and I began to think...there's nothing I can do to change His mind...He loves me, and it will never be...He loves me not.
I'm safest when I am in His fortified embrace, when I am swimming in the ocean of His love, and when I hold His hand on my rocky road. I might feel worthless on my own...but I can rest assured I am worthwhile to Him....and that makes all the difference....
